When we turned in our papers today, we were asked to discuss our concerns, and I think I finally discovered my largest writing demon. I've always had a vague idea of what it was, but today I was able to put it into words somewhat. I'm going to attempt to elaborate on what I wrote in class...I stress the word attempt. This may sound a little conceded, so please read the following in the sincerest, most humble voice you can manage inside your head:
My friends know me for my sense of humor. I am usually the one making light of serious situations and organizing the "social outings" (AKA trips to the movies). I'm not necessarily laid back all of the time, but I know how to have fun. However, anyone who knows anything about my academic history knows that I am also a very dedicated student (perhaps a little overly so at times). I am a hard worker, and I probably come off as somewhat of an over achiever in many cases. In my writing, I feel like my academic side is the one that shines. Most of my writing (aside from my poetry) sounds very formal, proper, and academic, which is a creative way to say I am boring. I'm not saying that people who write academically are bad writers, but I feel like when I write for assignments, I come off as dry and maybe even snobby. If I were simply judged on the writing I turn in for class completely apart from knowing me in person, I think that I would be perceived as only the hard working, over achieving, student. I wish that the papers I wrote sounded more sincere and down to earth, and I wish that my real personality (both parts) could be seen and felt. I think because I am aware that it doesn't read that way, I am afraid of writing. I know there are people out there that have found the magical way of making even the most boring topic into a paper that grabs and holds my attention all the way through. I know I'm not one of those people, and I'll be the first to admit I hate knowing that other people are better than me. I know I can't be the best at everything (or anything lately), and I will always find someone who does what I love better. This is my demon.
Well I think that's all I have for now. Hope everyone is hanging in there for these last 6 weeks.